Asthma, fitness and hating school sports

Be warned: pessimism and satire awaits you.

I despise sport, which I know to be a sad fact considering how important it is to one's health, but I hate it, especially group sports. No fault on my healthier classmates, and I can't exactly blame my teachers for saying 'let's play basketball' due to all the cheers it gets, but I can still be mioserable about it.

Out of all my sport subjects, year ten was the worst, and was coincidentally the last year I would be forced to have it. Why was it bad? Well, I don't like to pick at a demographic but- it was because of the boys, sorry male viewers. There was about four girls in this class (one who never showed up) and the rest were boys and unfortunately, they were from the obnoxious lot of the year level, who were always responsible for the times we had to stay in or receive mundane lectures. So on top of that nastiness, they were also very athletic. Which meant only the hardest, full-on sports.

Some of you are probably saying, 'couldn't you have just chosen the girls/individual sports?' oh I wish. Unfortunately they clashed with my art/literature, and I wasn't going to do dance, because not only had I recently left my ballet school because of how much I hated it, but because dance also isn't the best for asthma. 

So what did this mean? Basketball, soccer, football (an australian sport) and hockey. Which okay I've got to admit, even though it murdered my lungs, hockey is a theruapetic sport, because showing up that misogynist in my class when I whacked his hockey stick (almost didn't specify there) out of the way and took the puck from him, was always satifying. But at the start of the lesson, when the teacher would ask 'which sport today?' and all the boys would raise their hands up for soccer, again and again, it sucked. I always took the defense position, because fortunately, the boys were a bunch of tools who would purposely kick outside of the boundary, then proceed to play outside of the boundary as the teacher futilely chased them and told them not to. So the other girls and I would just stand there, and stand there longer. 

So one or the other thing happened. Either the boys would go off and break all the rules of the sport they had chosen, or the teacher would make us do footy out on the oval. And now we get into that. 

"Laps around the oval" were always a dreaded thing for me. True, often it was just one lap, but when that one lap required unfit-me to jog for the entire duration, it sucked. The teacher was behind us like a boundary, saying don't fall behind. You're right to guess that I was always on the boundary-sorry, sorry, by the boundary for those people who just visualised me being on my teacher instead. Obviously there are asthmatics who can do endurance sports, but that's because sport is their passion, meaning practice and health is always at the forefront of their minds. But for the avergae asthmatic, especially for one who does zero exercise and was just tapering on the edge of a healthy BMI weight, endurance sucks. Especially in winter, because you're trying to get the air in with different methods, focusing on your diaphram, breathing in through the nose, exhaling through the mouth-but it hurts. My legs didn't, they were fine all things considered, it was just that my chest always failed me first. And so on top of feeling crap, when you finally get to the finish line, you have a bunch of sniggering boys making fun of you for being out of breath. Because look at fat little you who couldn't run around the oval. Hahaha.

But out of all my school sports experiences, there was one that was the worst. In primary, one day we had to do at least three runs around the entire school. I'd already done two laps and when I reached the teacher, I was audibly gasping as I said, "I can't do another one". But he just shook his head and said I could. He wasn't saying it in a negative manner, but with a tone that implied that he thought motivation was the only factor when it came to sport. So I did another lap. My breath itself was hot as my entire chest burned, and when we went to the taps, I could barely swallow the water that everyone else was thankful to have. I can't remember much else, but I know for a fact that I cried and that I went home early that day.

Currently, my 17 year old self has made occasional achievements in my personal health. Funnily, it was after I had finished up with my ballet school and obligatory sports subject, that I actually became healthier. I lost a bit of weight, I was regularly exercising and eating healthier. Unfortunately I have done a nose dive, due to issues involving a disrupted schedule (I used to wake up at 6 to exercise even in winter, but I just couldn't get back into habit after being sick), stiff muscles which I kept tearing and my f*d up feet. My podiatrist told me not to do HIIT, which may sound reasonable, if not for the fact that HIIT has been the source of my success and enjoyment of fitness, seeing as it's perfect for asthmatics as it gives you a recovery period. Also the fact that I have a shit self-esteem so I only exercise at home and never outdoors, so thanks for the biking and kanoing advice, but I'll pass. Its been months since I had an exercise routine, but I'm once again reaching that point where I'm fed up with sitting on the couch. Even though I'm studying, doing personal reading/writing as well as teaching myself Japanese, there's a certain point where it's all just unproductive, regardless of what it is your doing sitting down. So I'm going to get back into exercising, and I'm going to be smarter about it in terms of making sure I bloody well stretch and take it easy. I can't tell you how many times I've torn a muscle on the first day, although last month was the first time I tore a hamstring. Couldn't even be sitting without it hurting, although I think the sprint I did the morning after probably aggravated it, because I was so late to school photos. Damn teachers always exaggerating that you have to be on time.

One last thing I'd like to encourage, fitness blogs with asthma in mind. Google it yourself, sport and asthma. You'll get the typical 'have your ventolin', 'don't push it', 'avoid allergens', which thank you internet, thank you. You have made it so easy for me to find exercise routines when you tell me 'have your ventolin on you', because I certainly would've died if someone hadn't told me to take the thing that's already always on me even when I'm in bed, not an arm's reach away. What would be appreciated, is exercise routines with asthmatics in mind. Because so often the main advice from blogs is to jog/run around town, which is fair enough advice for most people, but flat out running just really isn't a good thing for myself and others. So just some more fitness routines with us in mind would really be appreciated. 

Anyways, if you managed to read that structurally loose rant, congratulations- and I'm not being sarcastic about that. Not at all. Nor was that. Nor that. And if you have your own rants about people in general failing to consider your medical conditions, or assholes who don't realise there's thing called self-esteem, please rant because I would like to hear it. And if you know of any fitness blogs that keep asthma in mind, please recommend.

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